Jan 5, 2020
Let’s all take a moment and look back at 2019.
Specifically let’s all look at the things we learned. The
older I get, and the more distance unfolds from my life in the SEAL
teams the more humor I find in my day-to-day life. As I look
back at 2019, I cannot help but laugh.
I look at my life in five areas. Obviously, health is a
big area and as I get older big is the operative word. The
next area is work and accumulation of wealth. Ironically, the
older I get the wiser my choices and the more opportunities I see
and can act on. Another area of great value, at least to me,
is the area of learning. This area is filled with infinite
possibilities to once again learn lessons I could have learned as a
child. Not so humorous realizing I am not as smart as I
thought I was on a great many things. The final two areas are
relationships and spiritual discovery. And you have to admit
god has a sense of humor when you recognize “you get what you need
and rarely what you want in either area”.
So let’s acknowledge the lessons from health we learned, or at
least let me share what I learned so that you can laugh:
- Ultra-marathon runners are not right in the head. They are
excited to run a race even though they know they will throw up at
least once. They are thrilled to see others laying on the
side of the trail at mile 89 and often try to tell you “you are
doing great” as you lay there trying to die in peace.
- At age 51 getting out of bed and walking to the kitchen could
pass as a workout.
- Yoga is a four-letter word. Not to be used in the presence of
- Be honest with yourself and recognize you will have to add two
more months to the training plan that a 30 year old, highly ranked
running coach gives you.
- The key lesson, learned in the SEAL teams, is still in play.
Slow is smooth, and smooth is fast. And fast is slow.
- No matter how prepared you are there is a 30 year old 20 miles
ahead of you who isn’t intimated by you or even concerned you want
to kill him because he isn’t even breaking a sweat.
The next series of lessons from 2019 is the acquisition of
- At 51 you have forgotten more than most people younger than you
even realize. The problem is you can no longer recall.
- Key lesson from childhood still applies, say thank you and
people will help. Be a angry bitch and you are on your own.
- It is easier to learn something when you actually open the book
and learn it, than it is to read the intro and suggest you got
- No matter how great a shot you were, each time you shoot is a
new lesson that you have forgotten. So shoot more and talk about
the past less.
- Dumb is a state of mind. You can learn anything if you are
- Ask for help from people who are better than you and you will
learn lessons you have yet to learn. Ask for help from people who
are less and watch the how fast you waste your time and
This year in business has been tremendous. Let me caveat,
that statement with it has been painfully lucrative. The
lessons that were painful to learn are:
- Hustle makes you excited and tired. The wise business man
hires a team of wolves.
- Only spend an hour of your day with existing business clients
or engaged in things you are comfortable doing.
- If you aren’t fighting to get in front of 20 people a day than
you may feel great but you are not going to win.
- Surround yourself with 5 people every day who are committed to
pushing you in spite of your attitude. You can actually measure
success by determining who the 5 people you hang with.
- Social media must be the only way to succeed? Texting is the
only way to do deals. And everyone on you tube must be rich
and sexy, and happy. Sadly, none of that is true and branding
in social media is lucrative for the media company and pales in
comparison to real human engagement.
- Every minute and every person is an opportunity. Once you see
that to be true money is easy.
Relationships are the fun area, and the lessons keep giving
whether you are in the mood or not:
- Spend time with your kids because if you don’t, no amount of
money you make can buy them back.
- The woman makes the man, the man protects the woman so she can
- Women raise boys to become men.
- Men raise strong daughters, this is a truth lost in society
- If you don’t give your spouse 10 minutes a day they will demand
- Listen before you speak, share what you are doing not your
issues. And touch your family often. Intimacy solves more problems
than you can imagine.
Alas, we end with spiritual discovery:
- Your body is a temple, no amount of prayer or meditation will
overcome a broken temple.
- Your eyes are a passage to your spirit. Your ears are a link to
god so listen more. Your sense of smell determines if you are
a predator or a sheep…learn to smell better. Your sense of
taste determines your appetite. And finally your spiritual
soars with touch and intimacy. Don’t squander
- Speak about your goals and plans every day. If you don’t you
will find darkness quickly.
- Seek more silence because that is where greatness begins. Loud
chaotic environments make for dark times.
- Be completely tired at the end of each day. Hold nothing
back. Your spirit will thank you for it.
- Start over more often than you like.